The Tale Of Sir Breakenridge

I am a very classy man. I’ve been told this many times and have grown to believe it myself. I think it’s the bowler hat. It really makes or breaks you. I walked down the street strutting my custom strut that I had perfected after hours of practice. It was about nine o’clock and I was strolling leisurely toward my friend Sir Charles Whaler’s London penthouse. My 5,000 dollar suit flapped behind me in the wind. The sun shone high above the boring grey buildings bathing the sprawling city in light. As I reached the crest of the hill I saw the house, or more honestly the top of it. Atop the tall penthouse was a sprawling rooftop garden that was home to many rare and exotic planets. Surrounding the garden was a wide dome of clear glass. It been erected to protect the vegetation from pollution that rose from the many smoke stacks that scattered London.

As I walked down the hill and saw the entire house I was disgusted. It was obvious that my mutual friend Sir Charles was filthy rich. I was dirty rich, but he was filthy rich. In short that is like the difference between millions and billions. A sign above the door said proudly in gold letters The Estate of Sir Charles Whaler. I knocked on the door and listened to the echo with my ear to the door. To confirm my discovery I sniffed the door and was surprised. Agarwood, one of the rarest woods in the world. The door I estimated weighed about twenty pounds. The wood cost one million dollars per ounce. In twenty pounds there are 320 ounces. My mouth dropped. Sir Charles had spent 320 million dollars on his front door. I couldn't imagine what the inside would look like.